Finally someone who deserves to get hurt, gets hurt!

23 Sep

The 'fall man' himself. Doing another one of his 'causes.' Yeah right mate, like anyone believes you actually care. You only foster for the money!

Today I experienced the joy of watching someone fall over in front of me. They fell to the floor, tesco bags thrown askew, potatoes running amok, beer can pierced, spraying, spraying, spraying. Oh what a chuckle. A chuckle indeed, for who should this unfortunate soul be? A pensioner. Nay, I jest. It happens to be a rather unpleasant chap who lives opposite me. He associates himself with all the wrong types. You know, the kosher eaters with the big HILARIOUS sideburns. That’s not the only reason I find him a most disagreeable chap, no. He has so many unacceptable qualities! The other day for example, he was laughing about with this group of blacks and they made such an almighty racket. I like a laugh as much of the next woman, but he should have known that a group of blacks would make a lot of noise. Regardless of whatever community work he was doing, he should have seen that his incessant torrent of good jokes to these ‘underprivileged teens’ would cause this. It’s just selfish on his part to only think about himself and his voluntary work. It was 2pm on a Saturday afternoon! Some people have had a long hard week collecting Job Seekers allowance, and the one night they allow themselves time off to get out and relax, the very next day some volunteer cunt jokes about with kids outside their window. Some people!

It’s not even like it’s the first time he’s disturbed me whilst I was resting. One time I’m just chilling, I’ve had a tiring afternoon of waxing my legs, having a face mask and reading OK! magazine, when this inconsiderate fuck comes round and asks if I want to sponsor him running to Scotland and back for the children’s hospice he also volunteers at. The fucking cheek of it! I let him know that currently I was running low on money and that I hoped he did better with others than  he did with me, when the arrogant cunt says he’s ‘currently I’ve raised £44,000 but I’m looking to raise £100,000.’ Just shows the narcissistic bastards been sponging off people, which I fucking hate! To be honest I think that’s what I hate about him most, he’s always looking to get money off you. Fucking sponger. Last time I went down to collect my Job Seekers he was outside the town hall campaigning and collecting for Cancer Research. He’s always doing stuff like this. Always trying to speak to me and charm me. Always talking about how to help these different causes. Blah, blah, blah. Popping up and handing me a fiver in Tesco when my card got rejected, and refusing to accept it back a day later. The cunt.

So when he fell. Falling, falling, falling. I stepped aside. I didn’t catch him. I didn’t help pick up his potatoes. I didn’t help mop up his bleeding head, chin and hand. I just left. Satisfied.

Evidently… There is a God.

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